Yesterday I found out something, which would have been really great news just a couple of years ago. It would have been a huge step on the road to fulfill one of my dreams. However, dreams change as we grow up. Making this decision was difficult because old dreams are almost like old loves: they are melancholically beautiful, and when we bump into them again we are suddenly facing all the “what ifs”.
The only thing that justifies giving up an old dream, is to work hard for the current ones. I’m going to dedicate the next week, maybe even the rest of the month, to work out an action plan. This is going to be a holiday for my body and mind. I’m also going to see a doctor and then pamper myself. All my life has been afraid of being perceived as a “hypochondriac”, and I have always thought that as long as I can stand on my own two legs, I can be considered healthy. For a long time now I have been suffering from fatigue, nauseas, cold sensitivity, chills, strange headaches etc. It’s time to be checked by someone who knows what they are doing.
My body and my mind are a mess and they are in need of rest in the form of light exercise, massages, happy thoughts, meditation and good food. Fortunately I only have three days of work: and on Wednesday I start really early (at 5.30 am, and thus, finish really early) so I’ll have time to meet one of my best friends over lunch at our favourite restaurant. I’ve also scheduled a trip to Stockholm at the end of the week.