Life Is.

Sometimes the smallest words, the most unplanned sentences are the most important ones. I sleep too little, stress too much, find myself fat and stupid, and sometimes I feel like I’m not very important a human being at all. Days like that it’s more than nice to hear that your manager compares you to sunshine, your coworkers feed you pancakes because they claim they can see through you, a crazy 19-year old looks up to you, an old friend makes you feel happy and warm and your new friends make you shake with laughter.

And sometimes I just need to sit down and remember this.

23.58: Phew.

On  Saturday we walked so much in Budapest that we were a gang of really energetic people who arrived on the train to Bratislava tonight at 18.10 pm. Somehow I also managed to write a minor essay on philosophical research design AND discuss some potential work possibilities AND plan for my friend’s visit to Bratislava in the weekend AND talk to my mother on the phone.

Actually. Monday will probably feel like holiday.

Nem megyek én már haza… de jó nekem.

I like waiting for the bus in the morning. It’s such a peaceful moment – even though my eyes are usually still glued together and my brain works in slow motion.

Usually there are a couple of elderly women, some smart-looking men in long coats, some younger men wearing jeans and jackets and one girl or two.

This post made me think of all the things I’ve lost this year. (Yes, there’s still one month left of 2012, but I’ve already started the countdown. ). I have lost a lot of things – some hopes and dreams, a long-term relationship, a job, a country, the possibility (and time) to study Hungarian. I’ve lost some energy and at times I’ve felt like my sanity had gone, too. But at the same time I’ve received a lot – that long-term relationship turned into a great friendship, I have new friends and staying in close touch with old ones, I’m conquering a new city, a new country, a new language. I found a passion of sorts in sociology of law. I no longer study Hungarian, but now I’ve got Hungary right around the corner. At the end of the day I’m happy to be where I am right now.

A lot of things have happened in 2012, maybe that’s why I’m feeling so old and wise. Actually, I’m suffering from the feeling-like-an-old-lady-syndrome. Now it’s time to start living like women my age do!

And then.

Az intuíció (Hun: Intuition)

For being someone so completely out of touch with the spiritual world, I have spent an awful lot of time thinking about intuition lately.

The oddest things have happened lately. Quick moments, after which we’ve knowingly smiled and said I knew it.

I have very little faith in my own intuition. I doubt it, just like I doubt most things. Today, however, a very dear person told me “trust your intuition, but for this your mind must be calm: otherwise we might think it’s intuition, but it’s a thought. Intuition is like certainty”.

First Attempt

 

* * *Po kvapke tvojej lásky som dnes túžil,

ja, vetrom rozochvený list.
Možno mi slnko namaľuje na krík zopár ruží,
za tebou musím na kraj sveta ísť.
Na ceste sa mi biela šálka rozlomila,
z dňa zostal už len zlatý pás.
Noc, moja dobrá modrá víla,
nezahas svetlo, čo je v nás!
Potom ťa pojmem tíško za ruku,
ty si tá rosa krištáľová,
čo padá za skorého rána na lúku.
Na pásik tejto hnedej zeme
my budeme sa vracať stále znova,
kým spolu koniec leta nenájdeme.

Dezider Banga - Horiaca višňa, 1983

 

For the drops of your affection I longed today,

I, the leaf shaken by the wind.

Maybe the sun paints me on the bush of a few roses,

for you I must go to the end of the world.

On the road I was broken by a white cup,

only a golden strip remained of the day.

The night, my blue fairy godmother,

unveil the light that is in you!

Then I will take you quietly by the hand,

you are the crystal dew,

that falls from early morning onto the meadow.

To the strip of this brown earth,

we will return together, over and over again,

until we find the end of summer.

- Dezider Banga - Horiaca višňa, 1983 -

(Translation my own)

Expat Wisdom

Yesterday we were meeting up at a café at 1 pm. Two Finns, one Swede and one Russian. We were slightly surprised because the streets were empty and many of the shops were closed, but didn't think much more about it.

Shame on us.

17 November is a public holiday. In English it's the day of the Struggle for Freedom and Democracy Day and in Slovak Deň boja za slobodu a demokraciu*. On this day people commemorate the student demonstration against Nazi occupation in 1939 as well as the 1989 demonstrations in Prague and Bratislava that marked the beginning of the Velvet Revolution.

A lot of weird events and happenings are commemorated in the world; peace and democracy are probably two of the more important ones.

* a quick analysis. Deň (= day, subject) boja (=struggle, genitive masc.) za (= for, preposition req. accusative) slobodu (=freedom, fem. accusative) a demokraciu (=democracy, fem. accusative)

Men se på mig då.

Today I would like to write about something melancholic, grey and yet happy. What such a thing is, I don’t know. I just finished updating my research blog. We are comparing and contrasting the differences between the inequalities of Roma girls in an educational context in Sweden and Denmark. That sentence makes little sense, the topic is interesting.

It’s raining today. My room is a mess. This morning I thought about hugging and being hugged. Next weekend we are off to Budapest. The trip (bus to Budapest from Bratislava – train back – two nights in an apartment) ended up costing 50 euro. Not bad.

My stomach is feeling a bit funny and I would need to buy a new pajamas.  Today I bumped into a new flatmate, a boy I’ve never seen before.

It’s funny how weird one can be about totally useless things.

A friend recommended me a blog written by a 100-year old lady. That. my friends, is amazing. Think of all the things one can experience in 100 years: all the love and joy and adventures, and the sadness of course. I want to live until I turn 100 years old, and I want to love a lot. I think those are the main feelings in my head today.

Boldogság

Right now I’m feeling so happy – there are so many exciting things going on right now and I’m surrounded by great people – is there anything else one could possibly need?

Today I did some shopping. Surely it’s not a reason for my happiness, but having a proper coat does make life a little more bearable in wintertime.

The colour of this dress is lovely.

Let’s see if that Learning-Slovak-Project will start now. Do note that Slovak uses the preposition “pre” for “for”. Oh no, this is going to be confusing. In both Russian and Polish it’s “dla”. (sometimes “do”).

It’s Saturday and I’m home. Somehow I’ve managed to go out for wine three times this week and it has been a blast. Tonight was time for rest, though. This evening my best friend and I have been looking for flight tickets and in two weeks she’ll be here. I can’t wait!

My World

This post was inspired by this girl

Oops. It’s 1 am. Time to go to bed, perhaps?

Little By Little

This weekend I’ve drunk far too much, managed to take horrible pictures of people who under normal circumstances would be considered attractive, engaged in marathon-like discussions on politics with people I consider my friends. Slowly this is starting to feel like home.

The journey I’ve made this year has been a tough one. I n January I’d never have thought that I’d end up in Bratislava (of all places). I’ve developed as a person, and I’ve tried to actively combat my inner monsters. There is still a long way to go, but the direction is the right one. Maybe this kind of chilling-out was the best thing that could have happened to me at this particular moment – despite the side-effects of drinking too much wine, I feel completely energized.

Bonsoir, mes amis!

Long time, no see. How are you? Good, I hope.

This is what’s been going on here.

• Yet another research/methodology module started. It’s good, though. We get to blog and write stories and do group projects. Just don’t you dare claim that the field of social sciences is boring.
• It’s Friday tomorrow. Which probably means “a couple of glasses of wine” with friends.  And apparently there’s a chilli overdose planned for Saturday.
• Also planning a couple of trips.
• Also wrote a to-do-list which will keep me busy until I turn 75. At least.

Pics. Of food mainly – just to inform everyone that I do eat other things than salad and soup, like salmon. And vitamins. And COFFEE. And the picture of the shoulder is a vain attempt to photograph my favourite body part. Really, now.

What Is Sociology of Law?

This is a question I often encounter (and usually the most confused looks come from people who at some point have studied law), so why not enlighten the world a little bit on a sleepless Sunday night.

Law tends to think that it is independent and autonomous and whatnot. We disagree with Law and claim that there is a whole web of social relations related to law and that these need to be studied. A very minimalist understanding of the sociology of law is “ to sociologically conceive of law as a particular category of rules and the social practices associated therewith”1.

Sociology of law sometimes studies the relation between society and law, sometimes it shifts its focus and pokes its nose into other people’s business – the relationship between law and politics (and then ultimately, society. For goodness sake, don’t forget about society) is a great deal of fun. Sociology of law can boast and say it’s truly interdisciplinary – sometimes it flirts with economics, sometimes with (social) psychology, at other times it has a crush on social anthropology or criminology. The list is endless and life never gets boring. Mainstream sociology is always there for some entertainment in case everything else would fail.

So, what exactly does the sociology of law study?

• social development of legal institutions
• forms of social control
• legal regulation
• the interaction between legal cultures
• the social construction of legal issues
• the  legal profession
• the relation between law and social change

The Master’s I’m doing focuses on European law, so it looks slightly different. We occupy our pretty little heads with the following2:

• democratic and cultural preconditions and development directions of the European Union and European integration processes
• commonalities and differences in socio-legal cultures and traditions in Europe 
• impact of European legislation on Europe and its surroundings and how this relates to legal, cultural, religious and social differences within and among European states.

If this didn’t make you want to go to sleep, I don’t know what will. At least I tried. Goodnight world!

____
____
1) Mathieu Deflem: Sociology of Law: Visions of a Scholarly Tradition. Cambridge University Press, 2008. P. 5.
2) http://www.soclaw.lu.se/education/master-s-programme-in-sociology-of-law-european-law-se/about-the-programme

Three Coffee Cups Later

Word of the day: disentanglement
Question of the day: where on earth is my hairbrush? Plausible answer: in Vienna.
Feeling of the day: long time no see, you stupid migraine.
Heroic action of the day: managing to get the electricity back on.
Obsession of the day: chocolate with hazelnuts. Hello, healthy eating habits.
Nuisance of the day: all those bones.
Interesting person of the day: Erik Olin Wright