Sometimes one just knows. One feels.
A very short while back I was offered a job at the place where I did my internship last summer. That place I really liked, remember? Had that offer come a few weeks earlier, I would’ve said yes. Without hesitation, without doubt.
I said no.
This city has gotten to me. Its narrow streets, glimmering church towers, its greyness. The sunrise over the Danube, the cafés, the grumpy shop assistants. The beauty of the language.
I thought about going home. I thought about it non-stop for four days, intensely. I cried on someone’s shoulder. My family wanted me back, my friends told me to go, he who holds me tight in the mornings when I wake up said he wouldn’t want to stand in my way. Even my brother, with whom I speak extremely sporadically gave me a lecture through Facebook.
I still said no.
The greyness of Bratislava, the sunshine in my face, the lightness in my feet and the laughter that comes so easily. I’m happy here.
Right now is not the time.
You asked how I’m doing – I’m very happy. This risk of not going back to the safe and known is one that I’m more than willing to take.